Vyvacious

Last night, there were lots of balls thrust into unsuspecting faces at alarming speeds.  There was lots of panting and lots and lots of liquid.  Everywhere.  Then, from a ticked off voice, I hear…

Swim with it, don’t play with it!!!

Huh?  Oh yeah.  I forgot to mention, I was at my cousin’s water polo game and my uncle was screaming profusely.  Of course, I was too.  A lot of it involved me yelling “OH BALLS!!” at the top of my lungs and “AHHHHH!!!” any time an opposing player got near our goalie with the ball.  It was intense and yes, I was sitting in the splash zone.  Wee!!

I kept making comments (which were rudely ignored by my aunt and uncle).  My comments varied from

Wow, how do they breathe?  I would be gulping down pee-infused-chlorinated water by the bucketfuls if I was thrashing around like that!

to

Tie your freaking cap, kid!!  I don’t know who you are but tie your damn cap you can actually see and attempt to score, dammit!!

Poor kid.  But, not really.  Your rogue cap cost us some goals.  By us, I mean your team, of course.

So the funny thing about being surrounded by splashing water is that it makes me have to pee.  My aunt confidently led me to the restroom across the way since she had to go too.  I walked in and immediately saw THIS.

Umm.  I cannot pee standing up.  Trust me, I’ve tried.  It was messy.  VERY messy.  The aftermath was quite unpleasant.  Granted, I was 5 and super angry that I couldn’t pee standing up so I was determined to try.  Needless to say, I had a bit of penis envy back in the day.

We really had to go so go we went (Note: We went in the stall next to these nifty urinals, of course! …not that it’s any of your darn business… ;)).  As I was peeing (aren’t you glad you’re on my blog reading about pee AND delicious frosting all in one fell swoop?! :P), I remembered the time my other aunt was washing up after using the restroom.  She splashed her face with water, looked up, and saw a man standing in the doorway.  Needless to say, she screamed bloody murder and the man ran away.  Literally, ran.  Turns out, she was in the men’s restroom and hadn’t noticed all the neatly positioned urinals against the wall.  Sooo, one aunt doesn’t notice when she’s in the men’s restroom and the other just says “fuck it” and does her shit anyway.  Awesome.

Since we’re on the topic of bathrooms, my friend, Shirley, told me about the time she was walking to the women’s restroom at a movie theater and an old man somehow ended up in front of her so they were walking in tandem into the bathroom.  Needless to say, he turned around (probably due to all the snickering lovely Shirley was doing) and he yelled “Oh crap!” then proceeded to run out.  At least he didn’t stay, that’s all I’m sayin’.  Y’all remember Shirley, right?  I mentioned her in my Thin Mint Truffles post :)

Okaaay, back to the original topic.  Let’s see, we’ve covered balls…CHECK.  We’ve covered bathrooms…CHECK.  So what’s left…?  BROWN SUGAR BUTTERCREAM FROSTING, BETCHES! :P

This modified take on the popular buttercream has a more pronounced buttery flavor that has a brown sugar sweetness that isn’t too overpowering.  There will be a very slight graininess to this frosting due to the brown sugar but it’s a nice contrast to a moist Chocolate Shortie Cake :)  Seriously though, top a Chocolate Shortie Cake with this baby…you won’t regret it ;)

Brown Sugar

Buttercream Frosting

*Modified from food.com

Click here for a print-friendly version!! :)

Ingredients:

• 1.5 cups unsalted butter (3 sticks), softened
• 1 cup confectioners’ sugar
• 1. 5-2 cups brown sugar
• 1 tsp milk
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 1/16 tsp salt

Equipment:

• Large mixing bowl, hand mixer, rubber spatula

Recipe:

1. Beat the unsalted butter, confectioners’ sugar, brown sugar, and salt in the large mixing bowl until incorporated.  Taste and add more sugar if desired.  I personally used 1 cup of confectioners’ sugar and 1.75 cups of brown sugar.
2. Add the milk and vanilla extract and mix on high until smooth and creamy.  This will take anywhere from 3 to 5 minutes.  Scrape down the sides with a rubber spatula as needed.
3. Store refrigerated in an airtight container for no more than a week.  Remove from the fridge and allow to come to room temperature before frosting to ensure a spreadable frosting.

Put this amazing Brown Sugar Buttercream Frosting on some freaking Chocolate Shortie Cakes.  DO IT.  Big thanks to everyone who voted (unanimously) in my last post for this frosting to be posted today.  I LOVE interacting with y’all!  Hope to see more comments from everyone soon ;)

Until next time, y’all! :P