Ring in the new year with buttseks and Cheddar Mac & Cheese
Enjoy this fantastic conversation regarding buttseks with Mama Bear that occurred the other day…
MB: My butt hurts.
Me: I immediately thought of buttseks
MB: Oh *pause* doggy-style? *laughing, she starts to walk away*
Me: No. I mean buttsex.
MB: Yeah. That’s not doggy-style?
Me: No… That means sex with your butthole.
*look of horror*
Me: They have sex with you where your poop comes out.
MB: What?!? Why!!
Needless to say, Mama Bear was traumatized for hours. For the rest of the day, she would randomly exclaim “Why?!” and shake her head. I didn’t even ask because I didn’t want to deal with the tirade of awkward questions again. Poor Mama Bear had simply just sat down too hard and hurt her bum…and then I had to go and unwittingly teach her some new things.
Now with all of that buttseks out of the way, I can wish you a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! I hope you all had a safe but super awesome one whether that meant you went cray-cray and made out with a wall like Becca from 25tofly plans to do or if you just sat in your PJs and watched the countdown. I celebrated in style by dancing the night away with Mama Bear and her friends which to some sounds lame but to me is actually quite awesome. I get my groove on (which is always a huge plus for me) and no dudes (or anyone really) tries to rub their genitalia on me in an effort to take me to bed. It’s not gonna happen, dude. Or ma’am. More on that later.
I shall more than likely post pictures in a post coming up soon but in case you don’t want to miss all the action, follow me on Twitter, Instagram, and/or like my Facebook Page.
But really, I bet you’re just here for the Cheddar Mac & Cheese, am I right? Well, I know some of you wanted the Ghirardelli Triple Chocolate Truffle Brownies… I’m sorry but that’ll have to be my next post! To be honest, by the time midnight rolled around, it was a tie which I was surprised about. But since the Cheddar Mac & Cheese hit 5 votes first, I decided to go with that recipe for this post.
Don’t fret brownie-lovers, the Cheddar Mac & Cheese is pretty fucking delicious. I made it for Christmas and didn’t expect my cheese-unfriendly family to enjoy it but they did and all I was left with crusty bits stuck to the baking pan. Hell yeah!! The final picture does not do it justice and since we were so hungry, I didn’t have any time to take any “glamour” shots :P I put the picture at the very end since it’s so ugly in my opinion. Enjoy nonetheless! :)
Cheddar Mac & Cheese Recipe
*Tweaked from http://www.food.com/recipe/fannie-farmers-classic-baked-macaroni-and-cheese-135350
Click here to print or save the file to your computer !! :)
Ingredients:
- 8 oz of macaroni
- Half a stick of butter
- 4 TBSP flour
- 1 cup milk
- 1 cup cream
- 1/2 tsp salt (truffle salt if possible, it makes a huge difference)
- 1/2 TSBP freshly ground pepper, more to taste if preferred
- 1/2 TBSP paprika (smoked if possible)
- 2.5-3 cups of (a good brand of) cheese (I used Tillamook’s medium cheddar cheese), shredded
- 1/2 cup of breadcrumbs, buttered OR 1/2 cup of shredded cheese
Equipment:
- Large pot, coriander, large saucepan, whisk, large spoon
- 8×8 baking dish, parchment paper
Steps:
- Cook the pasta al dente according to package directions (6-7 mins). The moment the pasta is done, drain the pasta in a coriander and rinse with cold water immediately to stop the cooking process.
- Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.
- In a large saucepan, melt the butter then add the flour, (truffle) salt, freshly ground pepper, and paprika. Whisk until well incorporated.
- Pour milk and cream in gradually while stirring constantly until everything is thoroughly incorporated.
- Bring the contents to a boiling point. Boil for 2 mins while stirring constantly.
- Reduce the heat and cook for an additional 10 mins while stirring constantly.
- Add 2.5-3 cups of cheddar cheese in small bits while whisking slowly to incorporate all the cheese (I personally like an extra strong cheese flavor so I opted for the extra cheese). Let simmer an additional 10 mins once all the cheese is added to ensure it melts.
- Whisk a few more times then turn off the stove.
- Add cooled macaroni to pan and use a large spoon to coat all the pieces with the cheese sauce.
- Line an 8×8 baking dish with parchment paper and then spoon the cheesy macaroni into it.
- Here is where you either butter your breadcrumbs and sprinkle them on top OR sprinkle the extra 1/2 cup of cheese on top at this point for an extra gooey mac and cheese. Note: I did the breadcrumbs and they got sort of soggy after the first day which isn’t very tasty if you have leftovers.
- Bake 20-30 minutes until the top is golden brown for the breadcrumbs and a bubbling deep gold for the top cheese layer.
- Serve immediately. Store leftovers in the fridge in an airtight container.
Happy 2013, everyone! :D
Until next time, y’all! :P
Comments
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[…] this shit up, folks. All that talk about grabbing breasts, blue balls, sperm = a chicken egg, buttseks, getting coal for Christmas… It’s all part of the real-life Vyvacious family, yo! […]
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Vyvacious 
Mmmmm …
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Glad you’re “Mmm”-ing, fransiweinstein! :P Happy New Year!!
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Add to list…
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Done!! :D
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You had me rolling on the floor with your post.
Specially the, ” no dudes (or anyone really) tries to rub their genitalia on me in an effort to take me to bed. It’s not gonna happen, dude. Or ma’am.”
Dayum, girl, what are you doing on thqt dance floor??? Haha
Hope its not a “Jersey Turnpike”!!!!
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Hahahaha!! I just love dancing and for some reason all the fellas and the mamas think that means I want to get down and dirty with them right there and later in a closet somewhere which is not the case for either situation. Though a “Jersey Turnpike” every now and then is good fun!! Kidding…?
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Thanks Vyvy. That looks soooooo good.
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You’re welcome, Ira! Thanks, I hope you try it some time soon!! :)
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You have found my soft spot. No, not buttseks. Mac & Cheese. I love it so much, in a feel-good-makes-me-think-of-my-childhood-way, that my professional chef husband made it for our wedding 2 years ago. Yours looks delish!
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Yes!! I love finding ppl’s foodie soft spots :D
Aww how sweet!! OMG professional chef husband?! Where do I meet one?!?
Thanks so much! :)
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Oh, this is a huge soft spot for me. Huge!
I met mine on-line, actually. :)
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Yes!! I love finding people’s food weaknesses! :)
Oh nice!! I’ve heard a lot of success stories and I’ve heard a lot of horror stories as well. For the moment, I’m sticking to the traditional way of meeting people through friends. Slim pickings, lemme tell ya :P
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It was a success story all the way with us. If you really want to meet a chef, I think you only have 3 options. 1-Have mutual friends. 2-Meet on-line. 3-Skulk around late-night bars at 3 in the morning, in an effort to run into random restaurant staff members letting off steam post-closing. If your are lucky, there might be a chef in the bunch. :)
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That’s really great.
Option 1 is definitely more down my alley. Option 3 seems a little creepy…haha!
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Haha, creepy but practical! Restaurant people spend more time at bars, post-shift, than you could ever imagine. My Chef unwinds at home now, but he’s an exception.
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Interesting… I’ll keep that in mind! :P
Sounds like you got yourself a good one there :)
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He thinks so. Nah, I wouldn’t throw him back for all of the books in the world.
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Haha aww that’s cute :P that means a lot coming from you!! ;)
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That looks delicious — and the crusty bits left on the pan are my favorite. Yum! =)
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Thank you! Me too! ;)
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Sounds really interesting…except the visual image is a bit shocking :) As for the Mac and cheese, yummy!!! About the convo we had last time, I was able to record a grooving bassline for my latest track and I thought you’d appreciate it: http://joshprinsloo.wordpress.com/2013/01/02/week-9-scarlett-meets-tina/ Let me know what you think :D
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Haha! I think some people are taking this harder than others but really the dialogue is there just to be funny. Not trying to freak anyone out :P
Thanks!!
Awesome! Listened to it and loved the bass line you’ve incorporated!! I’ll leave a better comment on your actual site though :) thanks for taking my thoughts into consideration!! :D
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Butt Sex Happy New Year AND CHEESE!!! LOL This is why I LOVE YOU!!!!
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Hahaha!! I hoped some people would find it funny so I’m glad you liked it!! Right back atcha!! ;)
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Only those of us who are Truly refined!!!!
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You know it!! ;)
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So blunt. I loved it.
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Yee-haw! Thank you! :D
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Oh em gee….*makes plenty of notes* I have to try this soon, preferably this week. It’s a must….seriously. MAC & CHEEEEESE!!! Lalalala
Hahahah I wonder how my mom would react…won’t try it out though. She might faint…hehe.
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Please let me know how it turns out when you make it!! I want detailed notes through twitter and a final report, here!! :P
Haha yeah my mom hates cheese with a passion but the rest of my family ate it all up even though some of them are usually indifferent to cheese :)
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I promise that I’ll report back!! I’m sooo curious! :)
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Yay!! Can’t wait :)
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